New Babies

My heart is hurting. I noticed on Facebook tonight, that Cameron's classmate's mom had her baby. Her page is private and I'm only on her business page but I noticed on her husband's page that people started congratulating them on Friday. (And no, I'm stalking their pages or anything. We have mutual friends and I saw it mentioned on another page.) So, I'm guessing she delivered on Friday, December 30th. Yeah... Nathan's original due date. That's the second baby, that I know of, that was born on that date. A girl I went to high school with had her little boy that day.

I'm not mad or depressed. Just sad. Heartbroken that they have what I should have. I can't really explain the feeling. When I first realized the date, my heart picked up its pace for just a moment and I had a sinking, empty feeling in the pit of my stomach.

I keep waiting for things, like that, not to bother me or have that effect on me. I can be having a good or okay day and the smallest thing will remind me of my reality. Some days it doesn't bother me but some days, I just want to scream, "Give me an F-N' break!"

Really big sigh.................

All right, off the pity train and back to this new year, new life crap...