The days just seem to be blurring together. Every time I think of posting, I'm nowhere near a computer. By the time I'm in front of the computer, my brain is mush and my thoughts are all jumbled together. Some days, I just prefer to read and "like" other people's blog posts.
I had a meeting with the hospital last Wednesday. I met with another baby loss mom, Crystal (We went to high school together. She endured two losses last year, her son was born still at 40+ weeks in March and her daughter was born still at 20 weeks in November.) Mary, from Heartstrings (a local support organization) also met with us. Together, we all met with the hospital's chaplain (since nobody has officially take over the position at the hospital). The lady in charge, who I spoke with last year, retired at the end of the year.
I guess it went okay. I think there will be some changes in how they handle losses. How much, I don't know but they seemed open to the ideas that Mary offered, including a training program for the staff. However, I don't know if we're going to be able to break through the "red tape" and have our memory boxes distributed there. (Which is crazy, I know.) 'Here... we'd like to give these items to you to give to your patients, for free.' 'Oh, no thanks... we can't take them.' Really?!?!? (They didn't say that... but it's how I'm starting to feel.) I'm trying to stay positive but I just don't know.
She called and left me a voicemail on Monday and asked me to call her back on Wednesday... so I'll try and call her tomorrow. She mentioned that there were a few items in the boxes that they were interested in and she wanted to find out the cost associated with them. Maybe I'm being sensitive or too dramatic about it... but it kinda hurt my feelings. It kinda felt like a slap in the face. I mean, really, what difference does it make how much it cost? I'm not selling anything to the hospital... I'm donating it. (Of course the outfits, hats, blankets and pouches have been made by friends, but still... you get my point... these items are being donating by our project.) Yes, I want our business card or note card attached with those donations because if nobody ever knows about our project... who will help us maintain the donations? How will those parents make contact with other parents just like them? We have several wonderful resources on our site and I want them shared. Is that wrong... to ask that we be associated with our donation? (big sigh)
I'm really bummed. I see other organizations and they seem to have so much support and love from those around them. I have a very few select number of people who've stepped up and offered any kind of support for this project. If you are one of those people, I love you and am so thankful! If you're not, this isn't meant to be a guilt trip... just an observation! ;-)
We have Relay for Life going on at work and people have been selling baked goods, etc to raise money. Literally, every single day, for almost a month now... I've had to walk in there and hear about it. "We're selling this... the money is for Relay for Life." Before you beat me up, I KNOW that Relay for Life and cancer support/awareness are important. I'm just bummed because THIS is important to me. I "borrowed" Melissa's idea (from Mikayla's Grace) and began a flower fundraiser. (http://www.flowerpowerfundraising.com/campaign?campaign_id=10289) I placed the booklets in each locker room almost two weeks ago and not one single person has ordered or asked anything about them. It's really frustrating to feel alone, like nobody cares.
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Those were the same kind of issues that I ran into with donating our boxes. I literally wanted to scream and cry and pull my hair out when talking with the lady here.
ReplyDeleteI haven't had the energy to put much into any of my project over the last couple months, and it bothers me. I feel so bad that I'm not doing more.
I wish I was closer and could help you out more. (And just so we could hang out.)