Doctor Bill & Ultrasound

I've been debating for a couple weeks now, whether or not, to call my OB and ask for a copy of the pictures they took at my last appointment. The one where they told me Nathan was gone. I remember it seemed like she was taking a lot of pictures but I guess she wasn't taking many... just measurements. I finally called and I went today to pick them up. Well, 'them' turned out to be one. One picture. One picture of my son is all I got. I'm kinda wishing now that I had just left well enough alone.

I get home from the doctor's office and what does my lovely mailbox hold? The OB's bill charging me $1,900 for a vaginal delivery. They're kidding, right? I call the office to dispute the charges because I never saw the doctor. The 3rd shift nurse named Heather delivered my baby. I saw the doctor for a total of about 5 minutes the entire time I was in the hospital. It was long enough for him to basically tell me to "hang in there". I refuse to pay him $1,900 for his time. She said the doctor's submit their own charges. She supposed to look into it and call me back.

***UPDATE: Apparently, it was a "billing error". She said they've reimbursed the insurance company and they'll send me a new statement.***

Today sucks. I have to leave for work in about 30 minutes and I just want to hide under the covers. Allen seems to be in a crappy mood and it doesn't make me feel any better. My therapist recommended that I talk to him about how I've been feeling. I was thinking about it but now, I don't even see the point. I feel like nobody cares... like they're all just saying/acting like I should just get over this and pretend it never happened. I don't want to forget Nathan... but part of me wishes it were that easy. Forgetting and living without this pain and hole in my heart would be so much easier.