A new year of missing him...

My beautiful boy's 1st birthday has officially come and gone. It wasn't as difficult as I imagined it would be... for which I'm thankful. I miss him as much as I did a year ago but the pain isn't as raw and intense as it was in the beginning. He's beginning to weave himself into the layers of who I am and I'm beginning to grow comfortable having him there, beneath my heart. Okay? Never... it'll never be okay but I'll take what I can get. For now, my heart is the closest I can have him, so I'll take it.

A solar powered butterfly stone for Nathan's garden from Aunt JenJen (Allen's sister)

A butterfly yard stake for Nathan's garden from Aunt JenJen (Allen's sister)

Birthday dinner - crockpot shredded BBQ chicken sandwiches, mac n' cheese and crispy fries!

I wanted to try a new recipe... just something different for Nathan's special day.

I found a new BBQ chicken recipe and it was good!

Here's the link to the recipe.

Cameron and Granny (my mom) watching The Very Hungry Caterpillar on YouTube

Mommy and Cameron - Gosh, I love this kid!!! :-)

We had two sky lanterns that we were going to release but a giant thunderstorm rolled in and

rained us out. Cameron was so disappointed but I told him that we'd release them another day.